Every Night

The only thing I consume after 6 p.m. is chamomile tea or hot water with lemon, honey and apple cider vinegar. I don’t feel strongly for either. I will try to limit my phone and blue screen use a couple of hours before bed and I typically have a boring book to read on my side table. It’s usually a memoir or novel. Nothing interesting enough to keep me awake.

I take a half-full dropper of CBD oil an hour before bed. I also take melatonin and my antidepressant which usually makes me drowsy. I try to shower where I wash my face so most of my makeup comes off. If I miss anything, I can get it right before I do my nighttime routine of applying oil everywhere and putting my pjs on.

I have a sleep mask, ear plugs and a sleepcast meditation playlist at the ready and my blinds are always shut so as not to let in any light in the morning. I close my door. I don’t do anything work related or that could be considered stressful right before bed. I avoid Instagram. I don’t nap during the day. I do everything short of having one of those little lavender pouches you put on your pillows to make them smell nice which would represent truly giving up the idea of an interrupted night of sleep. And still I’ll wake up at some point, open up my resting computer and add Facebook back to look at old pics. It doesn’t help.